They asked me to come down and watch the parade / To march down the street like the Duracell bunny

I tell you, the real winner today is the city of Portland. Every time I come here it gets harder to leave.  I think you guys put something in the water – @ShooterMcGavin_

I was thinking about the city of Portland, OR last night for some reason.  I don’t know why.  I was there once for a week in the summer of 1997 and I was drunk most of the time, so I don’t remember much of it.  Our ship went there for the Rose Festival.  They parked us right in the middle of the city on the Willamette River.  We were treated like royalty by the locals and all we did was shit on the place the whole time we were there.  Young, stupid, and not appreciative of where we were.  We were in a phase of harassing cab drivers.  I’m not proud of it, but I can’t go back and change it.  My friend Rob decided to try the Shooter McGavin line on an unsuspecting cab driver.  It worked, he didn’t detect a hint of sarcasm.  I pushed another cab driver to the edge by sitting in the front seat, messing with the dashboard, and asking him if his daughters were hot.  He threatened to stop the car and kick me out, so I switched gears and asked him what kind of mileage he was getting these days.  Calmed him down and prevented us from walking a couple miles back to the ship.  Prior to his solo career, I knew a little about Elliott Smith from his band, Heatmiser.  Then Good Will Hunting happened and nothing was the same.  I still miss him a lot.  He was a Portland guy.  I feel bad I didn’t appreciate his city more.  I’ll get back there someday and make up for it.  Don’t let me DJ your drunken cab rides or this is what you’ll get.